Holy flying burrito Batman!

Not strange at all…
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a city in possession of a good amount of technically savvy occupants must also be overrun by strange and sometimes pointless inventions. Silicon Valley is that place and if you want a robot boss or a drone to deliver your burrito – this is your city.
  1. The BeamPro Store: I highly recommend visiting if you want to get that creeping sensation on the back of your neck. If you’ve ever had an assistant creep up behind you in a store and jump into sales mode, scaring the bejeesus out of you, you’ll definitely hate BeamPro.

    They sell virtual presence robots that are basically a screen for your face and a camera so you can see the person you’re talking to. It’s the Dr Who Library episode but on wheels. And without those pesky flesh-eating shadows (sorry, I just really wanted to write Vashta Nerada in one of these).

    The store is humanless – unless you’re counting the other curiously creeped-out people coming in for a gander. Everything is automated, down to the locking mechanisms on the doors and the roller shutters. If you have the $1,995 it takes to own one, you could buy it the old fashioned way, over the internet, or head in store to speak to the sales assistants who are kicking back in the comfort of their own homes while clocking into work in the form of a virtual presence robot.

    Shop assistants are already scary enough thanks

    Companies use them so that managers don’t have to fly out to different branches to check on their staff. Imagine if your boss popped up in front of you via a video screen on wheels? How could you resist the urge to punch his pixelated face?

    2.     TwoWords: This one counts because it’s a word invention. Every new-fangled version of software, business and the latest developments in “the cloud” has it. Two word names pushed together to form one word. But it’s not really one word because the second word is capitalized. It’s so annoying that I’d compare it to nails down a blackboard. Allow me to put aside my discomfort to use OneDrive as an example. It’s made up of two words. So what’s wrong with using the spacebar?

    Listen Drive, One needs some space.

    3.    Sereneti Kitchen: Basically it’s dinner from a cartridge. Here’s my disclaimer – I get lazy and buy a microwave dinner or a takeaway every now and then, but a meal cooked from a few cartridges seems unnecessary and also like it belongs in The Jetsons. You buy a kit of ingredients, press a button and dinner is cooked for you. What if I want to grow my own cartridges? Just don’t tell Michelle Bridges.

    The cookbot. There’s just something unsettling about it

    4.    Drone flying workshops: This is a thing here. Yash Patel from San Francisco startup Lumoid, which is running the workshops, told SFGate.com: “we’re trying to educate the people on how easy it is to fly a drone and…we’re trying to rid that social stigma that drones are bad”.  I didn’t realise that people thought drones are bad. I thought they were just for cashed up nerds. Although I quite enjoy the idea of drone home delivery. Particularly burrito home delivery. So maybe not all of these “inventions”  are a bad thing.

    They’re not bad! They come bringing food!
    Yes I realise that I may have gone slightly over the top. Each of these inventions probably has a good and noble use… Flying pizza can’t be all bad right?!

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