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Yesterday I asked a question of bathroom etiquette on Facebook that flushed out some fairly adamant and, at times, surprising responses. America’s weird toilets are apparently well-known amongst the expat community. But I felt like I didn’t come anywhere close to reaching my toilet humour potential. Nor did I get the chance to fully explore the extent of my knowledge of thunderbox synonyms.
AMERICA’S WEIRD TOILETS
When you move to a new country, it’s the subtle differences that you notice the most at first. The little, everyday things that you don’t really pay attention to at home because they’re familiar and the way things should be. For me it was the bogs. Be they of the public variety, or the ones in the privacy or your own apartment, they’re all just colluding to freak you the hell out. Let’s face it, America has some weird toilets.
Why is There so Much Water In American Toilets?
Honestly, there’s enough water there to drown in.
To start with they’re between half and three-quarters full of water at all times. That seems to be slightly too close for comfort to me. Sure, it’s all perspective, but sitting on the lav here makes you feel awfully close to the ocean and the frightening potential for splashback. You’re very welcome for that mental picture. I may have also heard a comment about some gentlemen, getting a little unwanted wash when they sit down on the loo.
One of the side effects of having such a “high water line” so to speak, is that when you flush, the bowl fills with water, scarily close to the rim. I dare you not to hold your breath the first time you see that toilet water rising to the edge of the bowl, and readying yourself for a mad dash as far away as possible. But if you really want the lowdown on why the water line is so high, read on.
Why do American Toilets Block so Easily?
I know, it’s not fun to talk about, but trust me, you’re going to be thankful that you read this one day. America’s plumbing is different to that in other countries, it’s narrower, which explains why America’s weird toilets are so easy to block. Invest in a heavy duty plunger, because you’re definitely going to need one. No two ways about it.
But if you’re anything like me, you’ll want to know why that is. It’s all about the method used to get rid of the waste in the toilet. American toilets are all about suction, they pull the waste down when the toilet is flushed, and then out into the “trap way”. The amount of suction required for this process means that the “trap way” needs to be narrow, and it’s usually around five centimetres wide.
Meanwhile, in Australia and Europe, water is used to push the waste down the drain, so the “trap way” can be much wider, and less prone to blockages. It’s also why there is much less water in an Australian or European toilet bowl, than there is in a US one.
American Toilet Bowl and Seat Shape
The shape of the bowl and seat are mind boggling. Step into The Oval Office and the throne (I could have gone with Resolute desk but it just doesn’t sound right) is exactly that – oval. What’s wrong with circles? Who is responsible for the design of the toilet seat? And why didn’t s/he deem it necessary to fork out for the small amount of plastic molding required to close off the circle/oval? Maybe American women are just all-round better people than I am, but for the life of me, I cannot achieve a hover over those damn things.
I found out the reason for the “U-shaped seat” right here on Slate. But if you don’t want to read through all the conspiracy theories, here’s a quote from Slate. “The original purpose for the U-shaped seat, according to Lynne Simnick, senior director of code development at IAPMO—the International Association of Plumbing and Mechanical Officials—was to aid women. Simnick explains that the open seat was designed to allow women “to wipe the perineal area after using the water closet” without contacting a seat that might be unhygienic.”
Yeah… I don’t know if I’m happier knowing about that or not. In any case, the U-shaped seat is listed in the IAPMO’s Uniform Plumbing Code as a requirement in all public toilets.
In public toilets theyalso give you paper seat covers for hygiene purposes presumably. Look people, I hardly want to touch the door locks (that’s a whole other thing), and you want me to place a piece of paper on a grotty turdis and plonk myself down on it? Uhh… no thanks.
Why is There a Huge Gap in American Public Toilet Doors?
So these gaps aren’t too bad, but there’s definitely the potention for eye contact.
I like my privacy and personal space. In queues, I purposely leave at least a metre between me and the person in front, at the gym I use the bike furthest away from everyone else in the room, so it stands to reason that I quite like my trip to the facilities to be private. Unfortunately the stall door engineers didn’t take this into consideration. Anywhere. There are large gaps between the doors and the walls. I’m talking big enough for you to accidentally cop an eyeful as you’re walking past an occupied stall.
So I did a bit of research on the reason why those gaps exist in the first place. And the truth is, it seems that either no one knows why they’re there, or they’re just not sharing the secret with the rest of us. Even Buzzfeed gave the mystery a shot, and couldn’t come up with an answer. But I’m satisfied with knowing that I’m not the only one who feels that this is just not on.
Why Are The Locks on American Toilet Doors so Flimsy?
These locks do not feel very secure to me
The locks are not very comforting either. I’m used to the kind of latch that turns all the way and you can see the lock mechanism engage. But not in the US. Turn that knob and you might see a tiny button pop out to slot into the door jamb. It feels like a gust of wind could blow that thing open at any second.
What’s wrong with these?
Bathroom Etiquette (or lack thereof)
And then there’s the bathroom etiquette. I’ve noticed this mostly at work. People will use the bathroom stall as a personal cubicle to conduct their life from. I’ve heard numerous phone conversations, soundtracked with some ambient tinkling, I’ve overheard people watching YouTube how-to videos and I’m fairly sure that one woman was on a conference call in there.
Thank God for copious amounts of hand sanitizer. I miss you Australia.They take their laptops and tablets in with them. There’s also someone in the office who pulls out ALL the seat covers from the dispenser and scrunches them up on the floor next to the loo. How old are these people? I ask this specifically because there’s a lot of wee on the floor. And sometimes other things.
There you have it, America’s weird toilets explained, and as many variations on the word “toilet” as I could muster. I hope this has answered all of your questions, but if you’ve noticed any other strange things about American public restrooms, let me know in the comments!
PMSL – I was definitely LOL as I read this – K and I have had very similar conversations when I was over there. I don't get the water levels and I definitely don't get the gaps in the doors – do they save that much money cutting the door an inch short ?????? I know it's one thing that K misses about Australia too !!
Have the best weekend (when it gets there) xox
What kind of country is America? What is going on?!
Do they call it the washroom? Here you can just be like "where's the toilet/loo?" but you never hear people use the word toilet in American stuff!
I don't know… nobody warned me about these strangeties!
You know, I don't think they do call it the washroom. At least not in SF at least. I always make an effort to say "bathroom", but yeah I get teased about loo…
Ugh! I lived in Africa and Asia for a while so when I return to Oz I wasn't particularly fussy about public toilets cos – if there was running water – then that was a good thing. Sadly I've become a bit fussier again as time has passed… but the whole toilet ettiquette thing isn't something we give enough attention to.
In a previous life I was involved with a company who supported o/s students on scholarships to Oz and one of the 'cultural' sessions they had was re toilets – not to stand on them etc etc..
Oh I have a 'love' and 'hate' relationship with toilets thanks for my ever-annoying IBS and never quite knowing WHEN..so I know the loo stops between home and Dad's in Sydney. I am actually 'grateful' for public toilets in Aus as they beat the alternative for me! I remember when I traveled to the US being weirded out by the water level too. Mind you, toilets I least like are the 'drop ones' on the roadside in more isolated parts of Aus. Thanks for linking up for #lifethisweek 1/52. Denyse
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OK I have nothing to complain about compared to you Deborah. I guess it's all relative to your experiences, isn't it?
Oh yeah, that's an important lesson. I guess it's confusing to overseas students having not dealt with those kinds of toilets. Less embarrassment for everyone too.
I can see why public toilets are so important to you (and to me). I swear that I used to know ALL the loos in London when I lived there.
I totally agree with all of this! I walked into the toilet cubicle when someone was on it because the lock didn’t engage correctly – SERIOUSLY, I am still embarrassed about this! Also, the look of horror of people’s faces if you dare say you are going to the TOILET….. I have learnt to say restrooms, or I will just say loo now.
OMG how embarrassing! That is my worst nightmare to be honest. Someone walking in because the lock isn’t engaged.
Hahaha, I say “bathroom”, which I know isn’t really what they say here but I can’t bring myself to be all hoity toity with “restrooms”.
Toilet talk never gets old and the US loos never cease to amaze me! Not only are they almost too full of water, they are SO low. Perhaps it’s a government initiative to get people to do more incidental squatting? I still don’t get the huge gaps in the doors. I can only imagine they were designed either by pervs or people who have no regard for privacy. It’s borderline indecent! I always thought US TV series and movies were laying it on a bit thick with how much happens in the bathroom but now you’ve told me about your office, it must be true!
Thank you! *bows*
There is no way to get sick of talking about loos. Hahaha, incidental squatting must be it, because otherwise I can’t work out why you’d do it otherwise.
Americans wonder about the door gaps too. We hate them, along with the broken locks, etc, and people absolutely discuss what store or location has nicer bathrooms. There is a whole storyline on Seinfeld, the record breaking sitcom, about knowing all the best public bathrooms in New York City.
I always assumed the imposed lack of privacy in the stalls was to prevent misuse: discourage loitering, illicit behavior, etc. Of course all it has actually done is cause people to become numb to it and go on doing whatever they were going to do anyway (as you noted.)
It’s true that Americans like a fuller water level than say, very low. I have a pretty solid theory as to why but, yknow, don’t feel like typing those gory details.
It’s similar about the shape: oval is absolutely considered newer and better. Circle is considered ‘quaint’ and old. An oval shape toilet bowl and seat here is actually larger (extension by length) than a circle design. It’s definitelt not about saving money. I believe it’s about allowing extra forward and backward room to prevent certain, say, overspills. Which obviously, per your illustration, is futile.
It’s definitely bathroom casually, restroom formally, or even more formally ladies’ room or men’s room. Washroom, lavatory, toilet and loo–anyone saying it with an accent should be immediately understood. But if you said it while perceived as a local, I could see people making a comment or taking a second to figure out why you are calling it that.
Often found myself with the very same questions. Why the big, overfilled oval bowl and why can’t they get doors, door jambs and walls to meet? Can I add those that auto flush to the list – I’ve had broken ones flush on me waaay before I was ready to move, and no one needs that kind of bidet!
Ahahaha! So gross and yet so true! I hate public bathrooms anywhere but I am yet to experience an Australian loo. Great post!
Lol! We Americans think they’re strange too! But we assumed it was the norm! Now I’m curious to know what Australian restrooms are like XP
Not that I don’t agree with a lot of this, but I must say I haven’t had great experiences with toilets in Europe either. I haven’t been Down Under, so I can’t speak to that… The best toilets ever are in Japan, though my husband and sons say they encountered a few that were little more than holes in the ground.
Newer toilets are required to have a lot less water. I heard the oval seat is to accommodate the male anatomy, but don’t remember where I heard that. ?
Anyway, love this idea for a post. It’s so fun to notice the differences in different places isn’t it!
I had to read this one – too irresistible a subject! OOOh, so much yuckiness! I’m not keen on those gaps and as for having a phone conversation ON THE LOO. No! I’m going to the States soon and I’d forgotten all about those peculiar toilets. You’ve got me worried now! #FarawayFiles
And RESTroom? Seriously, no one is having a nap in there!
Oh gosh, the gap! My co-workers and I were just talking about this today, and wonder why they don’t just close the gaps all around the stall doors! We were talking about how awkward it is when you are outside a stall and meet eyes with whoever is in the stall, through the door gap!
Haha, things I have never thought about 🙂 #farawayfiles
I had no idea that our “trap ways” are five centimetres wide, but that explains a lot!! I never thought our toilets were weird, but I can see why others feel that way. I couldn’t get over the shelf toilets in Europe – those things still freak me out! Unfortunately I’ve encountered many an American toilet with a broken lock – and no other options – and had to do the awkward hold the door while I’m doing my business thing. Ha! Thanks for writing about such an awkward subject. 😀 #FarawayFiles
I love your humour here, Katherine! I’m looking forward to some fancy loos when we go to Japan later this year – in fact, I’m expecting a whole host of beauty treatments for my nether regions. #farawayfiles
I JUST had a discussion/argument/justification of each other’s WC’s/toilets/restrooms with my Danish girlfriend after her return from a trip to the States last fall. She falls firmly in YOUR camp and I felt a little defensive I’m not going to lie, and have reverse culture issues with the receptacles here in Denmark. The toilets in Europe with the low water level doesn’t always FLUSH all the STUFF in the first go. So you have to use the same amount of water with double flushing. And don’t get me started on how DISGUSTING the ubiquitous toilet bowl brush is that sits next to every pot for swishing away any – pardon my Danish – skid marks that may occur. GAH. So nasty. Funny the things that you don’t question until you are questioned moving abroad. Thanks for the potty humor and perspective. Cheers from here. #FarawayFiles